Wedding Bells and Crawfish Tales
by sofia-lindsay
Summary: Dearly Beloved, we are here today to celebrate the love of two individuals. Femslash; don't like, don't read.


Title: Wedding Bells and Crawfish Tales  
Author: sofia_lindsay (sofia_)  
Fandom: Criminal Minds  
Pairing: Who do you think?  
Disclaimer- This information is believed by the writer to be reasonably accurate although I do tend to verify the tons of shit I make up.  
Rating: PG  
Summary: _Dearly Beloved, we are here today to celebrate the love of two individuals.  
_AN: This is for my 3 betas,(darkbard, calliope and Steppenwolf) for putting up with my stubborn, sarcastic, and sometimes bitchy ass. Love you guys!!  
AN2: Thanks to yellowsmurf6 for beta'ing!  
Archiving: Women in Kevlar, Femslash_Smut

Emily sat in the dressing room, staring out the window aimlessly at the cars approaching. As she thought about the past year's events, the nerves in her stomach settled. She knew she was doing the right thing, and as she pulled the diamond band out of her jacket pocket, there was no doubt in her mind that this marriage was all she had ever wanted. A knock on the door pulled her out of her musings.

"Emily, it's me. Are you decent?"

"Yeah, Morgan, you can come in." Her smile vanished when she saw the tense look on the profiler's face. "What is it? Oh my God, she didn't bail did…"

"No! Your bride to be is still here…but we have an unexpected guess."

"Who?!"

Morgan literally took a step back as Emily jumped to her feet. "Our Southern Detective friend has made an appearance…"

"Damn it to Hell!! Morgan, he will _not _ruin this day for me! Not for JJ either! Get rid of him, before I personally remove him myself!"

"Prentiss, we can't do that. He's already sitting down among people, in one of the first couple of rows, and the wedding is about to start. We can't cause a scene, and you know that's what he wants! So calm your ass down, put on a smile, and go out there and marry your woman!" The tall profiler couldn't help but smirk, "Besides, it'd be pretty funny to see his face when you're kissing his wo…er…ex."

**

_Dearly Beloved, we are here today to celebrate the love of two individuals. We gather in this place to honor the traditions of marriage as we remember here the companionship of countless lovers in history…._

The Southern Detective openly yawned as the Priest droned on and on. He knew he was being watched, not only by the Profilers, but also by the Ambassador's Security Detail. Yet he was still smirking; there was no way his blonde would marry the other woman.

_Emily, will you have Jennifer to be your beloved spouse, to share your life with her, and do you pledge that you will love, honor and tenderly care for her, in good times and in bad, in ease and in adversity, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, do you promise never to close your heart against her?_

"I do," the brunette replied, as she slipped the diamond band on JJ's finger, before adding, "and I promise to cheer for the Redskins as long as they aren't playing the Patriots!"

"Oh Emily, leave it to you…" the Ambassador could be heard muttering, causing everyone to laugh.

_And Jennifer, will you have Emily to be your beloved spouse, to share your life with her, and do you pledge that you will love, honor and tenderly care for her, in good times and in bad, in ease and in adversity, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, do you promise never to close your heart against her?_

"I do…and I'll try to deal with her Xena obsession as well." JJ replied, causing everyone to chuckle lightly again and Emily to blush.

_Very well. Emily and Jennifer have consented together in marriage, and have witnessed the same before you, and thereto have pledged their faith to each other, and have declared the same by joining hands and giving and receiving rings. Emily, you may kiss your bride._

As the two women's lips were about to meet, the detective stood, "Sorry to interrupt, Father, but I do believe you forgot to ask for objections."

"Uh, well I..." Flabbergasted, the older man looked from the angry Profiler, to an equally angry Ambassador.

Feeling the anger come off of Emily in waves, JJ wrapped her arm around her wife's waist and quietly whispered in her ear, "Babe, he's not worth it. This is our day. Let Hotch handle him…or your mother's detail." Without warning, Elizabeth Prentiss stood with her hands on her hips and her jaw set. JJ smiled, "Or your mother herself."

Will smirked as he walked towards the front of the church. "Jay-Jaaay, surely you didn't think I'd let you go through with this, did you? I mean, that is my ki…oof!"

The church erupted with laughter as the Cajun landed face-first on the floor at the Ambassador's feet.

"Um, sorry…I didn't know anyone was walking there…" Garcia shrugged innocently as she quickly pulled her foot out from the aisle.

Amused, Emily looked at the quirky analyst who was grinning like a Cheshire cat. Amusement turned to anger once again as Will scrambled to his feet and turned on the blonde.

"Uh oh..." JJ managed to get out, just as Morgan's fist connected with Will's jaw.

"Oh well, it saved me from going down there and doing it myself," Emily shrugged, as she placed her arm around JJ protectively. JJ just rolled her eyes, somewhat upset and somewhat amused by the turn of events. Turning back to the Priest, she smiled.

"Can we finish this, Father? I'd really like to get to my honeymoon soon!"

"Yes, of course! As I was saying before…"

"This will not happen! She's pr…"

"Just a minute Father," Emily cut the man off, before turning and punching Will. Without missing a beat as the smaller man fell backwards, she turned towards her wife, "Can I kiss you now, before Detective Crawfish here decides to object again?!"

As the two finally kissed, Hotch could be heard in the background, "William LaMontange Junior, you are under arrest for attempting to assault a Federal Agent…"


End file.
